Where there's a Will, there's a way

Glenn Beck claims he joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormonism) to get in his wife's pants. Maybe his wife is distracting him at church because I don't think he pays attention to the sermons.

The latest evidence of his inability to pay attention is his conspiracy theory about a communist plot to promote the horror of serving others. Newshounds has a clip of Beck making this argument on his show.

Celebrities are coming together to make it cool to volunteer. Disney gives you a free day at the park. This is all fine, but doesn't it seem a little bit convenient that all of this comes out now at the same time the Obama administration is calling for it? Obama controls the message through the media he holds in his pocket. Or in his little hand. And soon if you disobey, he'll just go [Beck slaps his hand]. Now the message will be embedded in television shows. Isn't this great? Aren't you proud of what we're doing? Oh, this certainly is change.

He also suggested we read Marx to learn about community service and lamented, "Well, this is fantastic. It's almost like we're living in Mao's China right now."

Earlier in October, the LDS church held their annual general conference when talks by top church leaders are broadcast around the globe. The worldwide church President, Thomas S. Monson, delivered a speech entitled "Serving others is the Lord's way."

Quoting Jesus' words that "whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it," President Monson remarked, "I believe the Savior is telling us that unless we lose ourselves in service to others, there is little purpose to our own lives. Those who live only for themselves eventually shrivel up and, figuratively, lose their life, while those who lose themselves in service to others grow and flourish — and in effect save their life."

Monson went on to tell heartwarming stories that came in response to a call for service he made last year. Maybe Glenn didn't get around to hearing that sermon.

I have a pesky question for Glenn Beck. Is the President of his church part of the Maoist conspiracy? Isn't it just a little convenient that it all happened at the same time? Is Monson's message of service controlled by Obama just like the Hollywood media? Is it just a coincidence, Glenn? Would it help if I rolled my eyes and use a sarcastic tone while asking questions like you do, Glenn?

I might make posts like this a regular series. Beck has the right to believe his brand of fascism is compatible with his religion, and I have a right to show he's wrong.